Support for my Oldest Son

Please do not skip this post, even if you do not have a child with Autism!

April is Autism Awareness month. Like last year, I will be doing a post spotlighting Autism every Thursday. I have two awesome guest posts coming up the next two Thursday’s. They each spotlight their sons. Today, I want to spotlight my oldest son Christopher.

Autism affects 1 in 54 boys. Process that for a moment. 1 in 54. My son is one of them. Autism is hard, lonely, stressful, intense, confusing, angering, frustrating, heartbreaking, and life shattering. Autism does not affect just my son. It affects our whole family. It affects his, friends, Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, church workers, and everyone involved in his life. I can tell you all day long about Autism, but until your life has been effected by it, you will not get it. OK, now we are back to the 1 in 54 boys. With those numbers it’s easy to say that at some point soon you will know someone with Autism. What will you do with that knowledge? Will you get involved? Will you run away? Will you learn? Will you ignore? Have you  ever thought about it?

I don’t know what you will choose, but I can tell you what has happened for my son. People have chosen to get involved, to supports us and him. The result has been astounding. My son is developing into a wonderful boy, and jumping over hurtles. His successes, may not be the same as other peoples successes, and I’m ok with that. Having people in his life who take the time to understand him, and to love him, and work with him, and learn about how to best support him, has made all the difference in the world. 

Having people support us and him has;

• Helped him develop friends
• Helped him learn compassion
• Helped him overcome obsessions (some anyways)
• Be able to play games
• Be able to attend bible study
• Be able to go to Children’s church
• Participate in library activities
• Stay with me in the a parking lot
• Learn to hug, and love
• Stay interested in learning
• Fit in so he doesn’t feel different
• Know that he is loved

My list could go on. Having support from those around us, is so important. At the beginning of this post, I listed a few things that Autism is. These were all negative things. Having support helps counteract those things for a family. When things are hard, someone is there to help it become easier. When it’s lonely, a friend is there. When it’s stressful, you have a listening ear. When it’s intense, they will lighten the mood. When it’s angering, they are there for prayer. When it’s confusing, they help you figure it out. When it’s sad, they will cry with you. Having support can change the face of Autism for a family and a child.

1 in 88, 1 in 54 boys. With those numbers, chances are you will have the opportunity to be a support to someone. We have been blessed to have supports in most aspects of our lives, but sadly that is not the case for everyone. It has not always been the case for us. There are many people who simply do not care to get involved, and there are many people who want to, but don’t know how.

Getting involved does not mean that you need to be an expert, or that you have to have someone close to you with Autism. Our supports have come in many different form.

• A friend who teaches their child tolerance
• The lady in the grocery store who caught him when he ran, and didn’t act like I was a bad parent
• The Mother’s Day Out teacher who read a bit about Autism and did everything she could to help him be successful.
• Grandparent’s who realize I am doing the best I can, and who are willing to learn to take care if that child’s needs, however different they may be.
• People who pray fervently for my children and family
• A children’s leader who takes extra time to figure out how to best include my kids
• A librarian who understands (or at least tries)
• The parents who are patient and kind and don’t stare rudely
• The friend who cleaned my house when things were to stressful, or brought sinner one night
• Those who consider my child's allergies, and are willing to make food they can have. 

As you can see there are MANY ways that you can be there to support someone who has special needs in there family. It’s doesn’t have to be hard. What will you choose?

Here are a few links that will tell you a bit about Autism. Please take the time to be informed. Remember the numbers. 1 in 88 kids in the USA. 

*What is Autism?

*My Child Has Autism, Now What?

*I think my child has Autism

*10 things you can do to help a family affected with Autism